You began your journey shrouded in guilt due to neglect as a child. You wondered if you caused this, what was the reason you felt so unloved? When you became of age you rushed into a romantic relationship all too quickly thus becoming jaded as the two of you had troubles. You soon became bored with this back and forth situation and due to the fact this relationship caused you so much trauma. You found yourself alone again. Once you were on your own though, you became increasingly nervous and shrouded in grief and loss that you found yourself envious of others. This lead you to internalize most of these feelings and become scared of the outside world. This is why you have been gifted avoidant personality disorder.